Following lunch with his office staff, the boss was in a rather happy mood and so thought he would roll out his latest jokes to brighten everybody’s day. With a captive audience he started to play the comic with everybody laughing loudly on cue except for one woman. Addressing the woman, the boss asked, “What is the matter, don’t you have a sense of humor?” The woman replied, “I don’t have to laugh, I’m leaving Friday.”
Funny, but on the serious side this woman’s bluntness unmasks the constant pressure of seeking to please people and have their approval in a way that is not honest or healthy. Surely we would admit that we often laugh at unfunny jokes, play favorites, hide our identity, hold back honest rebuke, exaggerate our interest in others, realign friendships, flatter, and render eye-service just to win certain people’s acceptance and approval. This is the temptation faced by the teenager who desires to fit in at school, the employee who desires promotion, the politician who seeks to win votes, and the pastor who jealously wants to build a big crowd. Listen! It’s one thing to give honor where honor is due, to rightly win the approval of parents (Prov. 15:20), rulers (1 Pet. 2:13-14) and superiors (Col. 3:22), but it is quite another thing altogether to inordinately please people to a point were we become unbiblical, idolatrous, disingenuous, and gospel deniers (Gal. 1:10; 1 Thess. 2:4). Pleasing people must not come at the expense of displeasing God (John 12:42-43).
One of the interesting things about Jesus was that while He had crowds, He never was a crowd pleaser. In fact, in Mark 12:14 the enemies of our Lord admitted that He did not unduly care about peoples opinions or approval. Christ did not “regard the person of men,” meaning He was not swayed by people’s position, power, prestige or pleasure. Jesus loved people, but He did not love the love of people to the point where He acted out of character. The fear of man never became a snare for Him (Prov. 29:25). The Gospel recorded shows that Jesus always remained true to Himself, to God who sent Him, and to the truth of Scripture. Jesus was not an approval junkie or people pleaser! Clearly, the improper pleasing of people is not a Christian thing!
Given the clear and present danger of inordinately pleasing people, how might we inoculate ourselves against becoming an approval junkie? One, consciously live before the face of God (2 Tim. 4:1-5; 2:15); two, pray for spiritual understanding about how you might fully please God (Col. 1:9-11); three, fundamentally find your acceptance in your acceptance before God through Christ (Eph. 1:6); four, make it your ambition to first and foremostly please God (2 Cor. 5:9-10); five, be willing to lovingly rebuke others when necessary (Prov. 28:23); six, focus on your responsibilities and trust your reputation to God (1 Thess. 2:4-9); and seven, remember that the judgment of men is a small thing compared to the future judgment of God (1 Cor. 4:1-5).
The practice of these seven things will help us fight the temptation to please people in a way that dishonors them, displeases God, denies the gospel, and makes us place the hypocrite!